Posted by Anonymous on 2015/05/06 under Uncategorized To my husband
What’s the point? Why should I speak, why should I say what I feel?
Every time I try, I try to take a leap. I get shut down and just weep.
You look at me with those judgmental eyes.
I search and stare and try to find those eyes that once looked at me with warmth and care but all I see now is those judgmental eyes.
How do I open up? How do I let go when the second I try, your finger points blame.
There was a time where my love for you grew so vast, I could not contain that bursting feeling, that crazy smile and the glimmering in my eyes…Now when your name pops up or when I think of you.
I feel sad, ashamed of myself, I can never be what you want me to be, I can only be me and me is not what you want. me is not what you need.
You told me I was the one just like you must have told 5 others, got down on your knees and lied. I beg for the truth, the TRUTH enemy of my heart but friend of my soul. I cry through the pain, got so much going through this mind feels like I’m going insane. Every little look or word that you say cuts like a knife; I feel the pain in every inch of me like it travels through my veins.
As you raise your head now as you glance at me all I feel my dear is those judgmental eyes.
From you wife……..Temeka Relu.